Telling her half of the dream was all the courage he could get at the time and he’d already decided not to push it. She was dealing with enough. The last thing she needed was to have him adding more to her fragile condition.
Searching for Home
by Chelle & Nikki
Brianna changed clothes and gathered her stuff. She walked out of her and locked the door. She didn’t see Taylor outside so she walked over to the car and put her bag in the backseat. She started the car and sat and waited for a few minutes.
Brianna thought about the dream she’d had but still couldn’t figure out what it was supposed to be so she decided to keep her mind off of it for the time being, and try to deal with one thing at a time. She’d come here to see what she could learn about her mother and herself as a baby, and that was enough for her to deal with. She was already overwhelmed and scared about that, and she certainly didn’t need to get any more confused about Taylor.
She glanced up and saw him walking toward the car yawning. He put his bag in the backseat and got into the passenger seat of the car.
“Good morning.” Brianna said putting the car into reverse and backing away from the motel rooms.
“Mornin'” Taylor said around another yawn. “I’ll drive if you want me to.” He offered.
“No, I can for a while. I want to go a little off of our planned route.” Brianna replied as she stopped the car in front of the office. “Here take the keys in.” She said.
Taylor got out of the car and walked inside. He came back out a minute later and got back into the car. Brianna pulled out onto the road and turned the radio on.
“Looks like there might be a storm coming.” Taylor said.
“Yeah, it is cloudy. I hope it doesn’t get bad.” Brianna said.
“Me too. So where are we going if you’re gonna take us out of the way?”
Brianna smiled. “Just something I want to see real quick. It won’t take but a minute and it’s not that far out of the way.”
Taylor sighed and leaned his head back. “Wanna know something really weird?” He asked.
“I guess just don’t gross me out.” Brianna answered.
Taylor snickered. “No, no. It’s not gross just weird.”
Brianna slowly pulled over into the next lane to get on the interstate. “Well, tell me.” She said after she was safely over.
“I had a dream last night and you were in it. But I wasn’t. I don’t think. I didn’t see myself, just what I’d have seen had I been there, ya know?”
Brianna’s attention was on the road and other cars but suddenly, she was very interested in what Taylor was saying. She didn’t want to alarm him or anything so she casually asked him more about the dream.
“Well, what was I doing? Where were we, or where was I?”
“You sitting on the ground, in this field. And your hands was up to your face like you were crying. I wasn’t very close to you. Then all at once, I heard this lady say ‘Go talk to her.’ I turned and looked at her, she was pretty. She was in a blue dress and had dark hair. I don’t know why but I couldn’t move. I wanted to talk to you but I couldn’t walk over to where you were. Then, you stood up and ran off. She said to follow you but you ran really fast. Then all at once I saw you standing in front of a big white house. You were just standing there, staring at it. Then you turned and looked at me but you looked so sad and like you wanted to say something but you never did. Then I woke up.”
“Yeah was that strange or what?”
“Yeah, Taylor. That was strange.” Brianna’s heart began to beat faster but in a way, she felt disappointed and let down.
For the next hour, they chatted about the motel and how uncomfortable the beds were, and about the rain that was obviously on it’s way as they both noticed the sky getting a little darker. The radio played music throughout the car and was a mind easier for Brianna. She drove off of the interstate and onto the highway.
“You still haven’t said where we’re going.” Taylor said.
“I know. It’s just something I want to see.” Brianna answered.
“Well, can we eat first?” Taylor asked.
“After. We can eat after.” Brianna answered. She drove down the highway and then turned onto a residential street. She made a few more turns through the neighborhood.
Taylor wondered more and more what it was she wanted to see. He was confused but she seemed to know exactly where she was and where she was going so he decided to just let Brianna have whatever moment she was looking for. He laid his head back and closed his eyes. Obviously, it was something she didn’t want to talk about.
He’d done enough for one day in his mind. Telling her half of the dream was all the courage he could get at the time and he’d already decided not to push it. She was dealing with enough. The last thing she needed was to have him adding more to her fragile condition. Taylor knew that Brianna could have some kind of emotional outburst at any time during this trip, and he needed to concentrate on helping her in whatever way he could, and part of that was keeping things as simple for her as possible.
He came out of his thoughts when he heard the car shut off. He glanced around and then looked at Brianna. She was just sitting there, quietly staring at a house across the street. She then turned and looked straight ahead of her for a moment and then back at the house.
“Where are we?” Taylor asked.
Brianna again looked straight ahead. “This is where I grew up. This was my home.”
“You’re kidding. Wow, it’s really nice.” Taylor said.
Brianna looked back at the home she’d grown up in. “I loved that house so much. I was safe there, no one bothered me. I was a member of the family when I was here. Well, in the house. In this neighborhood, I was the adopted kid.”
Taylor watched as Brianna stared blissfully at the house. He could see in her expression that her mind was wandering back to when she was a child. A happy child.
Anna and Ray had raised her in that house and it was the only home she knew for so long. Then she had just uprooted herself and searched for another safe place to call home. She thought she’d found it in Tulsa but now she was wondering if it really was all that she hoped it would be.
Taylor wished that he could tell her now how he felt about her but the moment she was having was too fragile for him to intrude. So he remained silent as she began to tell him memories of her childhood.
Her first date and how she’d come home to find Ray waiting on the porch, the times as a little girl she’d rode her bike or pretended to fly as she swung in the swing Ray made her every summer. Brianna told Taylor how she and Anna had planted flowers and how Ray had let ride in the wheel barrel and play in the piles of leaves when he did yard work.
Taylor laughed at these memories and he couldn’t help but feel the happiness she had a child.
“Do you think they would be angry at me?” Brianna asked.
“Who?” Taylor questioned.
“Mom and dad. I don’t think they’d want me doing this, looking for my real mom.”
Taylor was confused. “What makes you think they wouldn’t want you to?”
“Well, I don’t know. I just feel like I’m doing something wrong. Like saying ‘Gee, I’m sorry. Even though you were wonderful parents, I think that now you both are dead, I’ll go find my real mom. See ya.'”
“Brianna, I don’t think they’d feel that way. And it’s not like that at all. I really think they’d want you to know about your mom and your real family. I mean, from what you’ve told me, they sound like amazing people. I can’t see them being angry or even hurt by you doing this. I think that maybe they’d be a little disappointed if you didn’t. With you now knowing what you know, I believe that Anna and Ray would want you to go to Georgia and get some answers.”
“That makes sense. Sounds like them. I just don’t want to betray them. They were amazing, and I just feel like I’m doing something wrong.”
“Well, you’re not. You’re not betraying them, and you’re not doing anything wrong. You’re going to be thankful once you start getting some more information.”
“I guess. Let’s go, I don’t want to be here anymore.” Brianna said as tears filled her eyes and she fought to keep them from falling. She drove out of the small neighborhood and back onto the highway.
Taylor wanted to talk to her but he didn’t. He could tell she’d need a few minutes so he just laid his head back and sighed heavily.
Brianna pulled back onto the interstate and drove for all of another hour. It was quiet except the faint sound of the radio. Neither of them spoke. Taylor thought back to the dream he’d had and wondered if he’d ever be able to tell Brianna all of it.
Brianna stayed silent as well but wanted more than anything to know what had Taylor so lost in thought. She had the feeling that he was holding back but never asked him. She wanted to tell him about her dream but she also knew that she had enough on her plate. She had decided to focus on the main reason for the trip and not let anything get in the way of what she was trying to do.
This fictional story is hosted
at The Gifted Ones with permission from Chelle.