Time Goes On
by Chelle

~ CHAPTER 24 ~

The next morning as I lay in bed, thinking of the night before, I felt Zac's arm slide around me. I jerked and he paused, then continued until he was laying next to me and had his arm around my waist. I turned from my side to my back and gazed at him. He looked at me and then his eyes closed as he slowly lowered his head and laid it on my abdomen. His arm tightened around me and he began to cry. All he said was "Oh God, I'm sorry." Over and over he repeated those words. After a few moments, I took his face in my hands, raising his head so that he looked up at me. "Why? I don't understand what happened? That couldn't have all come from me being out late did it?" I felt tears in my eyes now. I had a need to know what had taken place to make him that angry. I had long since learned that Zac is the type who takes his feelings... anger, stress, sadness... out on other people. He looked at me and then raised back on his side to sit up. I watched trying to catch some sort of emotion in him but his face was blank as he stared into space. I waited silently and then came the answer for it all. "Karen lost the baby." he said in a emotionless tone. I sit up now, leaning against the head board of the bed. "What?" I asked. I was shocked and could no longer hold back the tears. He looked down and continued. "The baby died. About an hour or so after it was delivered. It stopped breathing and then the heart stopped and they couldn't get it started back. They had it hooked to machines but it couldn't survive without them so Ike and Karen decided that they'd just turn them off and let her go." Tears began to fall down his face as he finished and I quietly asked "It was a girl?" He nodded. "Yeah, she was 6 lbs, 4 ounces. Mom said she had some sandy colored hair but they didn't know what color the eyes were cause she never opened them. It was like she was asleep. They said she looked healthy but inside nothing was working. Her heart, her lungs, her kidneys, nothing was working without the machines. They said she wouldn't respond to anything and they thought she may have had brain damage since her heart rate and breathing was so unstable for the time they tried to deliver her naturally. Then when the doctor took her out, she wasn't crying or anything. Ike and Karen are both wrecks. Karen had to be sedated after the machines were turned off. Ike nearly collapsed. I told mom we'd be home tonight." I sit quietly crying and listening to Zac. He too was crying and I said "Zac, we should go now." He looked at me and shook his head. "No. I got us a flight that leaves at 8:15 tonight. We can go to the wedding. Besides, they aren't going to send Karen home right away. There's really nothing we can do and mom told me to stay and just come home after Lacey's wedding this afternoon. We'll just go back tonight." I nodded as we embraced in a tight hug, both of us crying on each other's shoulders. He then looked at me and said "Oh my God! I'm so so sorry baby! Oh shit, look at what I've done to you." With that he quickly got up and went into the bathroom. He came back a moment later with a wash cloth wet in warm water. He began to rub my face softly. Over and over he kept saying "I'm so sorry. I love you." I couldn't bring myself to stay mad at him. Yes, he had gotten drunk. Yes, it was wrong of him to hit me... but I just kept reminding myself of the horror he must've felt when he got that phone call from Diana.
If he'd not been alone, he'd have turned to me instead of the alcohol, then he wouldn't have gotten drunk, then he wouldn't have hit me. That's right, it was my fault for leaving him. I had convinced myself of that within the next few minutes.
Zac stopped washing my face and said "Let me go run you a bath." He got up and walked into the bathroom. I heard the faucet turn on and the water filling the bathtub. I slowly got up, my body still ached from the night before, and stretched. I walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchenette. I got a bottle of orange juice and a cup of mixed fruit out of the fridge. I walked over and sit on the couch with my feet on the coffee table and started eating breakfast. A while later Zac came in and said "Your bath is ready baby." I smiled and got up. He said "I'm gonna call and see how things are going with Karen and Ike." I nodded as I walked into the bedroom. I shut the door of the bathroom after walking in and quickly noticed that the mirror was steamed up. I got undressed down to my bra and panties and wiped my hand across the huge mirror.
For the first time, I caught sight of myself. The right side of my face was slightly swollen and discolored. I had a bruise under my left eye and a split lip. I had a little discoloration on each side of my neck and a bruise on the side of my forehead. My wrist were stiff and my arms and back ached. I sighed, quietly saying a thank you prayer that I'd decided to bring all of my makeup, as I turned away and slid off my underwear. I slowly stepped into the hot water, instantly loving the way it felt around me. I washed my hair and lathered up with my body wash. After I got out,I reached in and pulled the plug to drain the water as I wrapped a towel around me. My muscles had felt better and I began to rub lotion on. I heard Zac come into the bedroom and I quickly finished up. I walked into the bedroom and smiled at Zac. "How is everything?" I asked as I dug out a bra and pair of panties from the drawer. "Well, Ike ate a little breakfast this morning and Karen is awake and talking. Everyone is tired but mom said they've been sleeping in shifts. They are gonna let Karen go home next week if she does OK and then they want to have a short memorial service for the baby. No one thinks anybody could get through a full out deal. So they just want to have a short service, prayer and then bury her with just the close family there. There won't be a lot to it." I nodded as I pulled on a pair of jeans and then a t-shirt. Lacey's wedding was later that afternoon and I was going to Ricky's aunt's house with all the girls to get ready. Zac was going to meet us at the church. After a few minutes, Zac and me walked to the elevator and got in. The doors closed as he pushed the button to take us to the lobby. "Are you sure you don't want to go home now? I'm sure we can get an earlier flight." I asked taking his hand. He just shook his head and said "No, let's just stick with what we've got planned. "I leaned against the back wall of the elevator. When the doors opened, Zac took my hand leading me to the front doors and kissed me. "I'll see you after awhile." I nodded and walked out getting into the cab he called for me earlier. This was going to be a long day...

"Hold still!" I said to Lacey as she was in constant movement, in the chair. "I'm trying! God, I'm shaking!" She said. I sighed as I pulled the curling iron out of her hair and handed the strand to Rachel to be pinned back. We were all gathered in the back of the church doing our best to keep Lacey still while we tried to tame her hair. "Of all the times for you to have a bad hair day. "Rachel said as she let go of the curl once it was secure. Lacey sit in her dress, shoes on the floor and her veil on the closet doorknob. Rachel and me were in our dresses, hair done and makeup on, but still without shoes. Ricky's cousin was snapping pictures of the chaos going on in the 'dressing room'.
After we finally managed to get finished with Lacey's hair, her makeup was applied and we all go into our shoes and got her veil on. The photographer took no less then ten photos of the bride-to-be,her 4 bridesmaids and two flower girls. Then he took about five photos of Lacey. Then Ricky's aunt came in the room saying it was time. Once last hug, and a scolding from Rachel about crying while we wore makeup, and the wedding began. It was beautiful. The traditional bridal march played as Lacey walked down the aisle. I don't think there was anyone, not one of the 95 guest, that wasn't at least a little teary eyed when Lacey and Ricky kissed.
The reception was a lot of fun. Everyone seemed so happy and your's truly caught the bouquet... after that Rachel would nudge me with her arm every chance she got. That, for the obvious reasons, made me very uneasy. After Lacey and Ricky left, I hugged everyone goodbye and explained that Zac and I had to return home early due to a family situation. (I had already gotten a lecture from Zac, along with a hard slap across the face a couple of days before we came about giving out unnecessary information.) So, Zac and I headed back to the hotel and changed. After we got our bags and checked out, we went to the airport.Before long, we were on a plane back to Tulsa.

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